critiques on my work

[Thisfag]

How about shooting animation? If you aren't too lazy to make a chick shooting with a gun and making also a shell come outta the gun as it shoots.

[Off Topic]

Hi Thisfag!
Yeah I've planned to let her shot! It's one of the things I should do asap once finished the ones I'm currently on.
Originally also melee attacks were scheduled, but none of them will make it to the beta ( which will only let you shoot and maybe counter attack)... Don't know about the final release though!
I can already tell you that she will be shooting like resident evil's dudes: whenever you want to shoot you'll have to aim and you won't be able to move.
May be silly but it's both realistic and entertaining ( tactical and anxious) imho... Plus I'll be spared to realise animations of her running and shooting!
Thanks for pointing that out anyway, if you feel like something else is missing please let me know

[Off Topic]

Hey pals!
I've logged to post the first colored animation I've got.
After this upload I'll be away for some time, but I'll be reading your replies nevertheless... I'm just saying so because I won't be able to upload something else soon!
This file is huge and probably I won't post other colored things leaving their size untouched because it's bad... I'm sorry, but since it's the first I wanted you to be able to see it full size.
That way you can properly see all the mistakes I've made

*EDIT: naaah, changed my mind, I've resized it! ( Now you'll have to squeeze your eyes, but some wobble flickey line is still visible)

[that man]

...my god those are great animations. Tell me, about how long does a single animation take on average?

[Hazltot]

Nice.

[Sythis_Sythes]

Glad to see it's coming along nicely! The shirt kinda blends in with the other 'clothes' on her a little, making it seem fuzzy to me. (or i just wanna see nips cause it's hentai, personal preference again.) The colors do compliment each other nicely though, so it's a good start.

In other news, i need to stop critiquing so harshly... lmao.

[Off Topic]

Hi pals! I'm back!
I've tried to reply you with my phone but things kept going wrong so after the third time I wrote a reply and failed to post it I finally gave up!
( For those interested in sharing hobbies, I was snowboarding! I LOVE SNOWBOARDING... just so you know, plz tell me if you're crazy about it too! )

Now, back on topic... first things first, my replies!

Hi that man, that's an interesting question; it's been a while that I'm trying to clock how much time a single animation/scene takes me... it vary a lot from one specific case to another but an average estimation would be around... uhm... what was that? 15 minutes for extremes and passing positions, 5 minutes for rough inbetweens, 30 minutes for keyframes, 20 minutes for inbetweens, which entail a total amount of 30 hours for everything up to clean ups ( 45 drawings), then 30 seconds for every scan at 200 dpi and 30 minutes to finish off and color a single drawing in photoshop........... BUT this is just an average estimation, for example, the work I'm posting today took me only 20 hours so far ( which is less than what that estimation results)... the more I work on this stuff the faster I get, which is good because I'm very slow and lazy

Hi Hazitot and thanks, hope you'll decide to stick around!

Hey Sythis, thanks for your opinion! I hope you really enjoy those colors, because I'm afraid I won't be able to set up that color picker I was talking about so easily thus it probably won't be included in the alpha ( or whatever the thing before the beta is called)!

I really like to reply you guys
Ok... now I'm posting a new stuff, the one I've mentioned above.
It's not finished.
This is how she Aims, and how she Shoots too... I've already drawn how she Reloads but I still have to work it with photoshop, when it's finished I'm going to post that too.
Now, all those faces and stuff she does with her hands are simple loops, computer will decide when to run them... I've just arranged them this way so that you could see them all!
Since I'm running short on time I went through this animation with a little bit of careless... I mean, if I had more time I'd have probably tried to achieve a better sense of springiness but I've reached a compromise instead.

[Sythis_Sythes]

holy.... you spend that much time on each piece!? no wonder my art sucks... lmao. but the dedication shows, i assure you.
While the art does seem a bit less polished, i'm perfectly fine with it! In fact, i would hope you'd focus on making the alpha with just lined characters and THEN focus on coloring it, so you'll have a better idea of how you want it to look co-hesively, but i can't judge that yet because you've already done a lot of nice stuff for it that i can't complain!

Oh, and if those are gonna be random animations within the game you'll see if she sits for a while, (like link in ocarina of time right?), Then that's gonna look great when the game is finished.
Just don't run yourself into the ground trying to get stuff out for us1 Work at your own pace to get this content out when you can, not when we want you too! you'll enjoy it more overall.

also, seeing it up against a yellow background makes it easier to distinguish the colors, they're fine now. But i hope yellows not a prominent color in this game, cause i'll go blind trying to stare at it! (0.0) (you know why i would.)

[BlueLight]

holy.... you spend that much time on each piece!? no wonder my art sucks... lmao. but the dedication shows, i assure you.
While the art does seem a bit less polished, i'm perfectly fine with it! In fact, i would hope you'd focus on making the alpha with just lined characters and THEN focus on coloring it, so you'll have a better idea of how you want it to look co-hesively, but i can't judge that yet because you've already done a lot of nice stuff for it that i can't complain!

Oh, and if those are gonna be random animations within the game you'll see if she sits for a while, (like link in ocarina of time right?), Then that's gonna look great when the game is finished.
Just don't run yourself into the ground trying to get stuff out for us1 Work at your own pace to get this content out when you can, not when we want you too! you'll enjoy it more overall.

also, seeing it up against a yellow background makes it easier to distinguish the colors, they're fine now. But i hope yellows not a prominent color in this game, cause i'll go blind trying to stare at it! (0.0) (you know why i would.)

Just heads up Sythis, for your avatar, the neck is about the size of the head. Take your hand to the side of your head and move it down until you get to your shoulders. While your character doesn't look horrible i bet she could be improved is you widen the neck even a little. Of course you'll have to experiment since i'm talking realism and your doing anime.

[Sythis_Sythes]

Thanks for that, but i have a friend that sorely disagrees with the whole 'realistic' anime look. Which, sadly, is all i can really draw it seems. That, or horribly morphed style maybe. 0.o

I actually don't really know how to draw anime, i usually draw things realistically more often than anime style. I was just happy i made something that looked so... anime-ish! that i wanted to use it as my avatar.

I should get back into drawing some more, but dark souls 2 is only a week away........... :[ *Drools* }:

Like, stuff like this drawing is really rare for me to be happy with, because i'm trying to draw most of the human body UN-realistically.

Made smaller, felt bad it was so big and took so much space...

Character 2 Bust 2.png (291.29 KiB) Viewed 1493 times

EDIT: Felt the image was too big, and didn't wanna take up a huge space for everyone browsing here.... Kinda embarrassed about it now,lol. Sorry!

[Off Topic]

Here again to post the finished scene.
Said 'nough in the previous post yesterday, so I won't talk about it too much now !

i would hope you'd focus on making the alpha with just lined characters and THEN focus on coloring it

You know?
I thought about that too!
The fact is plain line art tend to get confusing because of alpha channel ( say, when you get a sex scene and two line arts overlap)... to avoid that problem I should fill those areas with a plain color, and since I'd already have to do that in order to " publish" I thought to I might as well finish them right away!

If her reloading proves to be too fast I've already thinked a couple of ways to delay it a bit... but this seems an issue I should care about sometime in the future, after the alpha gets done, not right now!

About my hurry... yeah, I've gotta agree with you, it's almost pointless since I too prefer to take my time when doing things rather than doing 'em in a rush.
Unfortunately the event to which I plan to " pitch" this project has a fixed date and I'd prefer to swap to a slow pace later if all the important things are done rather than the opposite ( because if I do decently I may be able to recruit some peons to chastise )!
Besides... the sooner you guys will be able to " play" this thing the better: we will have a lot of game mechanics and alternative game modes to discuss, not to mention all the " I'd like to see this in the game" debates... never ever did such things but judging by The Legend Of Krystal's experience those should be very exciting!

[Off Topic]

Apologies for the huge delay, had all sorts of problems in the past week.
The thing I'm posting is a raw pencil test.
I'd like to hear from you what you think of it, as usual
Many lines are still rough and I'll slightly adjust them with the clean up... plus the mutant itself won't be visible for most of the animation due to the fact that he's behind her.
One important thing that still is missing is his cock.
Nothing too fancy, really... I'm planning to have a bulge to represent it while still inside his shorts, every time her left leg swipes in front of it I take it to the next step, until his shorts explodes and his big willy makes the scene.
After that, it rapidly increase to full size and that's about it.
I was thinking to manage it this way because animating an erection is both boring and complicated, since his pelvis moves a lot.
Right now I'm not pretending it to be 100% perfect, I'd be ok just to hear you think it gets the job done... this due to a lack of time ofcourse, not dedication
P.S.: I'll probably add at least 1 drawing when his body stretches to make it feel better.

[Sythis_Sythes]

If you were looking to get the job done, you've more than done it. Only thing really bothering me, is his nipples supposed to swing about like that? just seems a little funny to me,lmao. Maybe that's what your aiming for though, judging by how the guy looks,lmao.

But yea, if this way is quicker, i still think it'd be better to start with it to make sure you don't make the scene colored and finished, and then realize you forgot something important, or you didn't like it at all. Better way to test it once you hit alpha,right?

[Off Topic]

Thanks a lot for the feedback sythis!
I'll upload the colored loop as soon as it's finished!
About the alpha... I've been testing a couple of things like backgrounds and a simple walking function, it's turning out good!
There will be bugs to fix before I can upload it but I should've enough time to do everything... I think!
Catch u l8r

[Off Topic]

Hey there! It's been a while!
Just wanted to tell you that I'll be pitching this little game the 10th of may here in my city, I'm really happy!
This means I'll soon have stuff to upload and also that hopefully I'll be able to finish all the things I've planned as content of this alpha!

I don't know what people will think about it but I'm happy with the way this work is improving so far, and if I can make others feel happy and excited with it as I am then that's even better!
Catch you later with, hopefully, other good news, have a nice day

[Realm]

Not sure if you're really looking for critiques anymore or not, but I just wanted to say the animations look great, but it's a bit over the top. Reminds me a bit of Dragon's Lair with the very cartoon-like gestures. This is by no means a bad thing, you may be doing that on purpose, just saying that it's incredibly exaggerated, and personally, I think it might be by little too much. Artistically, it looks great though. All the animations are fairly smooth, accurate, and the body language very accurately displays what's going on.

[Off Topic]

Thanks a lot Realm! I really appreciate what you say.
Yes, I'm always looking for constructive critiques and opinions! I like to have debates about what I do and, even if I eventually decide to do it my own way, that doesn't mean I'm ignoring the feedback ( I hope you didn't get that impression)!

About what you say, the over the top thing, it's totally true: this thing is not taking itself too seriously, and that's why many of its aspects are exaggerated.
I'm a big fan of traditional animation, especially of that slapstick/cartoon sort of feeling with which animators used to move their stuff on screen!
In my opinion, sex is a great thing that should make people happy and as such I believe porn must achieve the same result.
I enjoy a lot of the crazy stuff that internet porn has to show, but eventually the one I love the most is always the funniest... and that's the ultimate goal I try to fulfil with my animations: to light a sparkle of sexy fun in your day, using nudity sex and cartoons.

You know? frankly my very life is a bit over the top and I've issues keeping myself down to earth sometimes, it'd be interesting if you'd stick around to let me know when exactly you have the feeling that this thing is turning out way too odd ( example: Ren & Stimpy are over the top, Looney Tunes are not, imho)
Thanks again

[trunks2585]

Just wanted to leave my two cent and say it's very nice to see someone doing animations, and old school hand drawn ones at that, nothing in flash (though to be honest with a lot of the movements you've done, these couldn't be easily done in flash anyway.)

[Off Topic]

Hi there again!
First of all, thanks trunks2585! I appreciate you took some time to leave your " two cents" here, sorry if it took me so long to reply!

I've been messing with stuffs and problems, and my schedule says I'm late!
Now, I could post some of the props and shit that goes to the background, but I think it'd be better if I post the scene I've been working hard on until now.
It's unfinished but I'm almost through it, so I'm posting it anyway just to brake the silence

Again, I've been working against the clock lately but I'll soon get back to my own natural pace, so we'll have time to discuss better the things involved in this game if you're interested ( I am!)
and figure out what intercourse would be best next ( maybe anal, or crazy positions and so on...) together
In the next days I'll finish this thing and clean it up... even if it's not a proper sex scene it still embody the mood I'm trying to achieve well enough!
If you see things that suddenly stop moving and stuff disappear, those are the sections I'll be working on, so no worries.

Plus, if you think stuff should be moving slower, please let me know ( along with all your other observations!)
P.S.: this thing will be interactive but I've edited it so that shit goes straight to the end... the idea is that IF you fail to the mini-sexgame you MIGHT have a pre-ejaculation scene, I say MIGHT because you can still regain control of the situation if you're good enough ( not in the early alpha I'm currently building though)... so yeah, it's kind of an interactive sex.
P.P.S: I suspect flash did something wrong because some sections are moving faster than what they were supposed to...

[Sythis_Sythes]

The more i see of your work, the more it feels like a Saturday morning looney toons cartoon come to life as a porn game, and that is amazing someone could do that. especially since i haven't seen loony toons in forever!

I'm really loving that you keep surprising me at every turn. I thought when you came back with a drawing, it'd be the sex part of the game, but instead, i'm met with this jumping ball of scrotum,lmao. That made my day, sir!

It'll be really interesting now to see just what you have in plan for this game, and what comes to fruition, since the more you have planned, the more the work piles on and the more time it takes to get it right where you want it.

Amazingly, the penis actually looks good! It sounds kinda strange talking about it, but it's an....impressively drawn sex part that most games don't even care about in this business. Now, with the size of it compared to her waist, are you going to be adding bulging into the sex animations, cause it'd fit right in for sure with the size of this member.

As always, just keep doing it at a pace that feels right for you. Forcing the work to come out will only make it harder for you to like it later on, when you have the time to enjoy making the game again. One of the main reasons i said to put lower quality versions of stuff in so you could focus on that 'deadline' without having to worry about the art till you finished the basic parts of the game. Cause from then on, you'll be focusing on level design, music, 'sex' sounds, and the art a LOT alongside making the programming clean enough to get it running smooth.

But yea, can't wait to see more!